I commissioned my little brother to be a guest blogger for me. I enjoy his colorful writing and felt that he could better explain how we all feel about our mother and how we were raised.
This one is for you, Mom.
“All the posts in my brother’s blog are about a nightmare of sorts, which you awake from and move on. Only people who have a purpose can find a meaning in the twist of fate and facts that turned Sam onto the road from rags to riches. He didn’t have a helping hand, didn’t get a chance to take for granted. Pride and glory wrote this blog, not resentment and revenge. This blog is a tool to help and inspire others’ in similar situations that there is still a chance. I long for this to reach our mothers’ eyes. She deserves to be publicly reintroduced, just in case there’s more readers seeing our mothers character under-appreciated or under-par. She made a galaxy of impressive game changers throughout our lives so far. Sam asked me to post something after explaining a misinterpret by our mother. So, like our mom in his stories, I’m gonna do my best.
“Self-Distraction” inspired by our good friend “Misunderstood” took our mom by surprise. My mom’s immediate reaction during the reading of Sam’s, poetic, and critically personal memoir, left her with nothing but uneasy guilt and humility. Giving reason for this long write.
First of all, this blog is a story of a man and his need to share his race in time. Not one sentence typed is for provoking bad news. You are taking this completely upside-down, Mom. Just look at his “Right-Now”, guys got a corvette and a girl smarter than he is (“debatable” ~ Sam). He and his family are happy. One way or another, you had an immediate influence in his decision making as a father and a man. He’s obviously great at that. So the lessons learned by you had a positive impact. Something any mom should be proud of. Embarrassment is not the idea here Mom, it’s not to overwhelm you by self-destruction and fault. We are alive and advanced in ways, that only OUR triumphs and failures can teach someone. We are variously arranged fighters of uncomfortable situations, making us stick out confidently in the struggle for that W(win). There is a passion we all have when emotions get the best of us, which keep us moving forward.
Be proud of who the man is Sam has become. Don’t dwell on the past that got him here.
Look at the way we give to others, even while we are clinging tight to only the bare essentials in life. Knowing the people we helped had a choice as well. That’s your kindness and understanding glowing in our veins. Our kids will be in a better situation, but your tactics and hard work (that we witnessed), will give them the appreciation of the smaller things in life. Not to mention a predictable future. Those lessons alone should make it impossible for you to feel guilty, it made us who we are. That is the importance of your part in the blog. These small thoughts about lessons will inevitably pass from you to your “legacy”. Sam has a reason to share this blog with readers, not to embarrass our mother, but to personally satisfy how proud he is of himself. To prove that the beat down by his beginnings is p***y s**t, in comparison. Compared mostly to the up-top, successful as fuck, shit storm, we all know his finish line will forge.
Mom, you did the best you could, however the lesson formulated itself. We have kids with prosperous futures, because you never gave up. You should be awarded nationally, just for making it through the shit we did to you growing up. Keeping us safe while single and overloaded by financial priorities. Choosing to keep us and not take the easy way out. Your triumphs might have felt small, but the impact they left will last an eternity. I can see why you would feel guilty, and embarrassed, but nobody gets to make catastrophic choices. You are a 5 star problem solver, your mistakes had no time to worsen. Another great skill, we all have because of you. We all have problems, we all did things that we will take with us to the grave. As terrible as the stories sound to you, we can’t think of another childhood we’d go back to and start over in.
Mom, there were rags and riches in the mix, but your grand kids, they will live their lives understanding why much sooner. They will be chasing their dreams with a little more confidence from our part and from lessons we learned from you as a parent. We used your imperfections and our own to do more than we ever believed possible. We did it efficiently and respectably. One way or another, because of you. You are the trunk of our family tree. You have created a foundation for your “legacy”.
Growing up sucked, things could have been much different and our childhoods could have been better. In 20 years our kids, will blog about how great their childhood was because we have our shit together. That’s all because our mom set a reoccurring positivity that cannot be broken by time. For that, stand tall Mother, you have nothing to be ashamed of. It’s no secret you’re the only thing in our heads once a day, no matter what. Thank you for everything.